my poor blog!

I do love you and I do plan on coming back here - i have SO much i want to say!!! But uni and Monkey and the new Business have meant that the only down time i get is enough time to sleep! And maybe watch Rafters. . . .but I WILL be back here. . . SOON

What a busy week

I think I may be making some progress this week - heading in the right direction as appose to just drifting!

I have registered for an online store at MadeIt - a great Australian website for all things crafty and handmade! Because this required me to make a decision about the name and logo I was then inspired to dive even further down the rabbit hole! I than made a facebook page for my little store and the most exciting thing of all - I bought myself a new toy!

She is a beautiful Machine and her name is Janome! We have only spent a couple of hours together but I have read the book from cover to cover. . .

I learnt a lot and have since bought a walking foot so that we can sew quilts together.

Anyway the point of this post is basically - I have a new toy and to justify its purchase I have decided to stop talk about selling kids clothes and SELL them. I have even registered and paid for a stall at the Baby Markets coming up Townsville in July! SCARY!

So wish me luck . . .

Hopeless. . .no lazy but hopeful!!

I have been so busy reading other peoples blogs lately (I think I have a problem) that I have not posted anything at all for such a long a time and anything worth while for even longer!

Not too make excuses but life has been pretty crazy these last few weeks and by the time I get to 'me time' there is nothing left in the tank for my poor neglected blog. So in the hope of making amends with my sweet blog I have given her a face lift - both the books and the red background will hopefully help me remember where this blog started in the first place. It was meant to be a tool to help me work through the book 5 that I so desperately want to use and apply to life. I seem to have got a little side tracked - at first by writing about other things and then by not writing at all!

I will say though the blog reading has been very interesting! And it is exciting to know there are so many like minded people out there in the world. And many more who think and see the world in a completely different way! Which is maybe even more fun to get insight to! So to all you interesting people - this blog is for you. Please check out my reading list there are some great reads among them and in later blogs I want to mention a couple that really got me fired up.

But for now it is a lazy Saturday afternoon - I am in the front yard watching super baby explore and somehow seek out all the dangerous things to touch, eat and stand on! Thanks super baby for keeping me on my toes!

TTFN

Where did that week go?

So last blog I set myself a task, or a list of ten tasks actually to try and inspire myself to DO the many things I think and,or talk about doing but so often don't.

I knew I wrote this list on a Sunday night and tonight is Sunday so my week is up and it is time to set down and reflect - OPPS it has really been TWO weeks!! And that makes me really sad because I already know I have failed at a lot of the tasks planned and the fact that a whole two weeks has just slipped away amazes me!

So lets reflect;

This was weeks tasks;

- Two blogs based on the book FIVE - I did NONE X

- Two uni assignments done and finished - I did do two YAY

- Start made on third assignment - YES

- Start made on Exam revision - XX Bombow!

- Research started on ou Market stall idea - Nope

- One or two meals in the slow cooker (that I have had for at least 6 months and used once) - one happened but only cause Kel was so inspired!

- Ride bike at least once - I didnt even do this!

- Paid all bills to date - mostly - my banking was too slow today to finish the task

- Make a start on writing a budget (I want to start July with a stick budget in place!) - havent even thought about it

- Post some pics on my new (currently empty) PICS page - two pics posted directly after writing the original blog!

WOW despite the fact that I sucked at achieving these self set task I am excited to do better this week. And I like the process of self evaluation so I shall give it another crack! But not tonight Im off to sleep! My boy has a cold so he may be up a fair bit later so i better close my eyes while I still can!

TTFN

hope you all enjoy your week.

Late Night Call to Action

So I should be asleep, I have been asleep but bub had a dirty nappy that needed attending so I delt with that, then had a shower, made myself a hot milo - oh and ate half a packet of shortbread!!

Now I have 15 min before my battery dies and I have been reading my blog posts and blogs of strangers and I have decided that while I have got more regular with my blogging I have got a little side tracked on the whole purpose of it. So starting tomorrow - it's BACK TO THE BOOK for me! And I am going to set myself weekly tasks and see how I go at achieving them :-/ that is my attempt at a worried face!!

SO this weeks tasks;

- Two blogs based on the book FIVE

- Two uni assignments done and finished

- Start made on third assignment

- Start made on Exam revision

- Research started on ou Market stall idea

- One or two meals in the slow cooker (that I have had for at least 6 months and used once)

- Ride bike at least once

- Paid all bills to date

- Make a start on writing a budget (I want to start July with a stick budget in place!)

- Post some pics on my new (currently empty) PICS page

There - thats ten to kick me off. I hope writing them down makes them easier to achieve because some of them have been on my to do list for a WHILE!

Can only try I guess.

TTFN

Mad Hatter Tea Party

I have joined the greater blogging community and am having a blog party this June! Check it out by clicking on the Mad Hatter Tea Party Button on the side of my rock.

If you want to come to my Tea Party, or have one of your own please say so. We will don or prettiest dresses, bake our scrummiest cupcakes, brew some delightful tea and partake in the madness and and frivolities.

Details will follow at a later date but I just wanted to put it out there that I am VERY excited.

"MOVE DOWN!"

This kid knows how to party

All I plan to say about this pic is that;

- this weekend way and above topped the one a few weeks ago;

- I love having good friends and family around me;

- The people in my life inspired and encourage me to be more;

- This kid is the light of my life and he too makes me strive fo improvement; and

- This kid sure knows how to party! YAY First birthday party was a success!!

Thank you to anyone who played a hand in the festivities of the weekend! I do NOT know what I would do with out you all!!!

Loads of love . . .

TTFN

Everyone needs a good opshop!!

I just spent $25 and 1 n half hrs chilling out on the floor of my local op shop reading second hand books! Ah, hows the serenity. I should have been doing laundry o tiding the house - but :P that will all wait! I should be doing it now but here I am blogging. . .

I have so many things to blog about that I dont know where to start and if I try and blog them all today it will take me two weeks to get around actually post this blog so all I am going to say (and then housework here I come) is I love that I am blogging. When going about my day I cant help but think "what part of my day is worth blogging" this leads me to pay more attention to the details and take notice os the unusual.

The little monster I created also helps me to do this as even though he is not even really talking yet he points to things all day. He notices things that i dont even see and it is wonderful to watch the world through his eyes.

I realise I am not saying anything profound or even original but I really am doing these things every day and it has changed how I feel about the world and my place in it! So I challenge you all to look harder and notice more (you dont even really need to slow down I run all day).

Just see what you can see in your everyday lives that you didnt see yesterday.

TTFN

friend wanted. . .pants optional

Today I told Miss Rae Rillie that she was such a great friend that I dont even fell the need to put pants on when she is around. She then suggested that I should put up a notice looking for more friends that would allow me to be pantless. Hence the pic!!

So while on the topic of friends I want to say a quick hey and THANKS to all the amazing friends I have - I honestly dont know how I got so blessed with so many strong independent kick ass girlfriends in this crazy world!! Could do what I do with out all of you!!

Could say more but it would just get sappy and I should go to bed!

TTFN

The Perfect Weekend!

I dont even know how it happens sometimes but once in a while, even in this CAZY world you can manage to get a couple of days in a row where you simply cant wipe the smile off your face!

And that is how I found myself this weekend.

With wedding business on Saturday - a stunning grassy outcrop over the ocean on Magnetic Island, guests all in white, Bride and Groom in purple, seafood, palm trees, rolling waves, it was a simply magic day!

And today has been a day I could even sneak into my top ten days ever - just hanging out at home with my best buddy in the world! Bub has been a bit grumpy and out of sorts all week (those dam teeth!) But today he was so happy from brekky to bedtime! We read books and played with the hose, walked on the beach and had a picnic by the sea, laughed and laughed and barked and barked! And even had time for us both to nap.

Then, to top it all off he went to bed without any real complaints and I have been on my computer ever since reading some VERY inspirational blogs. OH and I found a new publication that I want to get my hands on ASAP. You should all check out Dumbo Feather.

I do find though that there is a fine line between inspirational and overwhelming. Read a good blog and I go "Hm I should blog tonight" read another one and "I should TOTES blog right now - and start that art thing I have been thinking about all weekend" read a couple more (especially one from a lady who has 7 of her own running blogs, all of which she has posted to in the last 36 hrs) and it is more "I don't think I compare to these - maybe I wont blog at all anymore."

Never the less - here I am - having a go - throwing my hat in ring! In more ways then one this weekend but I will tell you about the other few things when they come to the light a little more.

In the meantime I hope everyone had half as good a weekend as I did!! :)

TTFN

some days its just all too hard!

I pretty much played hooky yesterday - i failed to do much uni and i succeeded in not doing a hell of a lot at work either! Why?? Because it just all seemed too hard - i wanted to hide in a little hole and just sit still for a minute!

Today is not much better though I have made some improvements to the state of our house!

This pic is me at Laneway Festival earlier in the year and I keep thinking about it yesterday because it is just how I felt all day - simply spent!

Today however I am going to get rid of the junk in my car (stuff for vinnies) and I have already cleaned the floor and done some laundry, so I am feeling much more accomplished! I am still pissed at myself for having NO $$$ in my bank account. You would think by now I would be better with money - and I have been of late but this week I bought myself a bike - which is awesome and I am determined to go riding today (with Asti in his little seat on the back!!) - but I some how miscalcuated my financial situation and am now not sure how I am going to put fuel in the car between now and Friday. Lucky the bike is a free mode of transport!

I realise I am saying a lot of not much but I am just forcing myself to Blog! And hopefully in the next few blogs I will refocus and say something worth while.

So in the meantime . . .Peace out :)

time is FLYING!

That last post was really written on February 20 - i just hadn't posted it so I could come back the following day and spell check and reread it - but here we are now April 11 and I hadn't been back until tonight.

Why am I so bad at keeping the promises I make to myself? I need to value my own opinion more and maybe then I will honor the tasks I set for myself better. My first attempt includes this blog - but I need to shut my computer down now and close my eyes before they fall out of my head so I will be back to finish this post tomorrow!

TTFN

And 26 days later. . .

Yep - still sucking at the whole consistency thing as far as this blogging goes. Its been almost a month since my last blog and I dont even know where the time went. I often think about what I am going to write but I just never sit down and do it.

It has been a pretty hectic month, back at work and doing more hrs than I had planned, sorting out my uni subjects, trying (and failing) to still get the housework done - thank god for Kelly.. emotionally it hasnt been a fun month either.

I am having a hard time dealing with Aston's dad - but thats all I am going to say on that topic, because those who know me know it all anyway but mostly because this blog is where I want to come to be positive about my life! And my life has so much to be happy about so to quote the best movie ever made. . ."No we mustn't dwell!"

And I do want to get back to reading the book but I have had this other thought niggling at me for a few weeks now so the book can wait another day.

What i want to know, what I have been asking myself over and over again the last few weeks is - At what point in my life did I (and I just a lot of us) stop being proud of myself?

The light of my life has decided that he going to start walking and it is so amazing to watch him learn. Every day he gets a little braver and a little more sure so he takes a few more steps! It is incredible, however, what makes my heart burst with happiness each and every time is that every time he takes a few more steps his little face beams up at me with exhilaration and joy, but best of all PRIDE. Even when he falls over he is just so excited at how far he did get! And i just don't know when I lost the ability to be proud of myself like that for the small things and the big stuff!?

I don't have an answer just wanted to put the question out there - and I intend to feel proud of my accomplishments from now on (or try to anyway!)

My 5 Values

So its been 5 days now . . .and I'm still not sure what my life values are. I guess number is pretty easy.

1. Family - which now means Aston. I want to do all I can to provide for him and be the best mum I can be. I know that sounds a bit wanky but I really mean it. I also want to take the time though to enjoy watching him grow, learn and change. It has been such an amazing joruney already and he is only 9 months old.

I also love being close to my mum, dad and siblings and am trying o reconnect a bit more with some of the extended family.

Friendship was going to be my number two but the friends I have now are more like family. The group of people I send most of my time with is just one big (often disfunctional and always crazy) extended family!

Now I'm stuck. There are so many things that make my life what is it that I am finding it hard to narrow it down and focus on the most important things.

2. This might seem silly but I think Adventure would be a top five. I want so desperately to travel and explore the world (which i will do just might not be for a few years). So in the meantime I think it is important to find adventure in our everyday life. I want to camp more and all that sort of thing but even trips to the park or walks on the strand. I think Adventure is also a frame of mind - so tackle each ad every day like it is your next exciting adventure!

Helen Keller once said "Life is either a daring adventure or nothing."

3. Career/Financial Security - HUH! This used to be my number one or two for sure but more I am a little jaded on the topic. Well not jaded I guess I have just changed how I feel about it.

Career wise I still have goals and ambition it is just more about saving up to buy myself a bookshop to run then being the Richard Banson of my generation.

Financial Security has actually increased in importance but it scares me now (because it seem in elusive concept). And as for the house dream. . .well lets just say I hope we get there before Aston starts school!

4. SLEEP!! Again might seem silly to you (but if your a mum maybe it won't). This is a tricky one though and I actually have to work hard to remind myself to sleep and or rest. As life gets busier over the next couple of months being super organised and staying focused are going to be critical but so is making time for some down time! So I guess I also mean time to read (and to blog). Lets rename for TIME FOR ELLE! Yep I like that :)

I should have made friendship number 2 - then I would be done now and could go to bed!

5. Learning (or Growth) I think will round out my top five. I love to read and learn about other peoples lives and experiences, countries, ways of thinking or seeing the world. I hope to god I finish my official studies this year but I love always learning more at work or from books - hell being a mum is just big learning curve.

I think this is big thing for me at the moment because I have made a few colossal mistakes over the last few years - and while I cant regret them, because I wouldn't be where I am without them, I can forgive myself easier if I learn the lessons from them! Which I am still doing on a daily basis I think.

This blog is hopefully another instrument in my growth this year. I am sure those of you reading this that spend time with me a regular basis will see a gap between what I write and what I do or say over a cup of coffee. Just so you know, I am well aware of the gap! I just hope the more I write and think this way about life the smaller it will get!

Well its WAY past my bed time and this was a hard one to write. . .so

TTFN!

4 Questions on Values in Life

To recap on yesterdays blog - I am reading the book 5 and hopefully using it to help me make a better life for me and my boy Aston.

The first task set by the book is to help the reader figure out their person values; that is what is truly the most important things to you in this life?

To help us "not so in touch folk" work this one out, the book first gives you 4 questions to answer.

I answered one yesterday but as I have inherited a bit of my father's anal retentiveness I am going to copy and paste it for no other reason than to have all four questions and answers in the same place (so if you read yesterdays feel free to skip on down to question 2).

1. What are the 3 things I like most and least about myself?

WOW - tough already.

The later part of the question is easy;

• I don't like that I am a "gunna doer" and a "never actually doer" (or at least a "never actually finisher").
• I dont like that I am so disoganised - yeah thats not going to work well once Im working and at uni. I cant even get my bills and my filing under control.
• I dont like that I am embarrassingly unfit! Im actually ok with how I look these days (or I dont care really) but I want to be fitter and healthier.

BUT HHhhmmmm what do i like the most. . .

• I like how much I love being a mum! You probably think this is silly but I know people struggle to enjoy being a parent thanks to all the sleepless nights and sooky days, and I would be lying if I said I didnt have moments, even hrs, when I wonder what the hell is this life I now have. . .but for the most part I really love just hanging out with my boy, he is my best friend in the world and he cant even talk. I love that I can enjoy him so much and love him so much my heart aches!
• 
  
• I guess I like that mostly I am pretty content with myself and my life, I didnt want this, in fact this life is a really long way from what I wanted but I have never been happier and life is what you make it so we are trying to make the most of everyday! (yeah I like this attitude about myself).
• 
  
• I like how much I like to read. Nerd alert. . . lol. I love reading about other peoples lives and experiances - i think it makes me a fuller person.

2. Who is the happiest person I know?

This one was actually a really easy one but I am going to have to cheat and talk about two people. My Uncle Kim and Aunty Judy (Who arent really related but are really family). Kim is a master jeweler and owns his own shop where he works with his son Jay. Judy works in the shop doing the paperwork, when she is not babysitting the grad kids or practicing tai chi.

Kim loves to cook and wine, Judy loves sudoku puzzles and not cooking. They own a bit land and have a few cows. Their home is beautiful, rustic and I believe built mostly by Kim and Judy's father.

I dont know what their secret is but they seem truly happy and content with their life and their place in this world. They treat each other (and everyone) with such respect and kindness not to mention love. I hope that as I get older I can find so much peace in my life.

3. Who are the two people I like and respect the most?

Now I have been thinking about this since about 3pm yesterday and Im just not sure. . .Kim and Judy would go close but the list is longer then that. I have some pretty amazing people in my life these days so its hard to pick two!

I have to mention my fabulous housemate. She is so patient with me and my baby (and my mess). She is so caring with Aston and she is living the life I thought I would! Kel - I love ya and you are one of the most driven, ambitious, kindest people I know and I do respect you and love you dearly.

Mum and Dad have their own amazing attributes each and again I have the deepest respect for them both. I hope I can love and care for Aston half as much as mum did with us (even though she annoys the hell out of me sometimes)! And Dad has such a good work ethic and dreams still of traveling the world (I might have to come with you dad).

4. Who am I?

WOW - been thinking about this one all day too (and lots of last night - not helpful!) and I have no idea, well not no idea but it is still a tough question!

I asked mum about it and her answer was "your a mum, a daughter, a sister and many more things!". Dad's answer was "your a 25yr old (thanks dad im 24), almost uni graduate, with exciting career prospects and other opportunities around the corner, who is also enjoying the challenges of raising a little fella".

I like dad's a little better simply because its about me and not just what I am to other people - but thats what I mean about mum, always thinking about everyone else.

I think I am a pretty cheerful, outgoing person who loves to read and hope (against hope!) to travel some day and see the many of the wonderful things (and people) this world has to offer! I am trying hard to give my life focus and purpose and enjoy every minute! (I fail lots obviously but at least we are trying).

Well there is nothing overly conclusive here but it really does get you thinking about the big questions! And now the idea is to write 5 values for my life. . .might need another nights sleep on this one - see you back here tomorrow.

TTFN!

Where will I be in five years from today?

My name is Elle and although I am a mother of an 8 month old baby boy (like thats not enough to keep me busy) I have decided in the last 7 days, to go back to work (15 to 30hrs a week), I have enrolled in what I hope will be my 2nd last semester of university (6 - 30hrs a week) and now am determined to have a house deposit saved by my sons second birthday. . .agh!!

In order to help me along this crazy journey I am reading "5" it is a book written to make you think about where you want your life to go, it encourages you to write personal values and mission statements and set yourself goals along with lots of other things I haven't read about yet.

So I thought for any of you keen - come on this journey with me. I will read the book, answer the questions it poses (as best I can) and do my damedest to get through the next 12 months in one piece!

For those of you who read my last (very poor) blog effort;

there are no rules this time but I would like to write at least one blog a week - if nothing else this will keep me focused on the tasks I have set for myself and hopefully help me continually strive to make the best life possible, not just for me but for my beautiful bub Aston Jude!

So here goes -

In the first few pages of the book the author Dan Zadra poses 5 questions that are to help you identify your top values in life. . .

1. What are the 3 things I like most and least about myself?

WOW - tough already.

The later part of the question is easy;

I don't like that I am a "gunna doer" and a "never actually doer" (or at least a "never actually finisher").

I dont like that I am so disoganised - yeah thats not going to work well once Im working and at uni. I cant even get my bills and my filing under control.

I dont like that I am embarrassingly unfit! Im actually ok with how I look these days (or I dont care really) but I want to be fitter and healthier.

BUT HHhhmmmm what do i like the most. . .

I like how much I love being a mum! You probably think this is silly but I know people struggle to enjoy being a parent thanks to all the sleepless nights and sooky days, and I would be lying if I said I didnt have moments, even hrs, when I wonder what the hell is this life I now have. . .but for the most part I really love just hanging out with my boy, he is my best friend in the world and he cant even talk. I love that I can enjoy him so much and love him so much my heart aches!

I guess I like that mostly I am pretty content with myself and my life, I didnt want this, in fact this life is a really long way from what I wanted but I have never been happier and life is what you make it so we are trying to make the most of everyday! (yeah I like this attitude about myself).

I like how much I like to read. Nerd alert. . . lol. I love reading about other peoples lives and experiances - i think it makes me a fuller person.

There you go - not as hard as I thought it would be. But it is 10:30pm so I might post this and answer 2-5 tomorrow.

TTFN (ta-ta for now)